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Measure Twice, Cut Once

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Like many families during the partition of India and Pakistan in 1947, my Dad and his family had to give up their estates, their businesses, and their heritage to move to India.

After being homeless and hopeless and moving from one city to another, he settled down in small-town Pune and went into the business of making school bags to support us.

Way into the 1970s, he was still in the same business. His business involved buying scrap from large fabric mills in Mumbai, cut them by hand at home, and then farm them out to cottage-based workers to assemble. The bags were pretty, colorful, light, and inexpensive. They were also a rage with the followers of John Lennon in quaint little Pune. The income was meager but it supported a growing family of five kids. Some of us even made it to college because of hand-made byDad.

At times, at home, my siblings and I helped out in trimming, buttoning, folding, and bundling the bags by dozens so Dad, helped by elder brother could bring them to market. More than trimming, buttoning, and folding the bags, I was awed by how Dad could, skillfully and gracefully, hand-cut dozens of them every morning. I begged to be taught how to cut. He consented and my training began. I was eager to zip, zap and zoop with my scissors and pile up cut goods like he used to but he’d keep asking me to flatten the fabric, align it correctly and measure carefully. “Measure Twice, Cut Once,” he’d say every time I hurried to pick up the heavy steel scissors and chop away at the fabrics.

Even though he hadn’t licensed me yet to cut goods on my own, one Sunday morning while he was out, I picked up a pile of fabric and began to chop away hoping to impress him when he got back. When he did get back and laid his eyes upon my handiwork, instead of a smile crossing his face, his jaw dropped and his eyes hardened against mine. As I looked into his eyes I knew something had gone wrong. I quickly picked up the measuring tape, checked the cut goods and my heart sank. The front of the bags did not match the back of the bags and the sides were all tilted. When I looked up at him with shame his eyes softened and he said, “Measure Twice, Cut Once the next time around.”

Years later, I put up a factory, shipping garments to customers across the world. Except for the original patterns on paper, all other bulk work was computerized and cut by machines. This, of course, did not guarantee flawlessness and perfection but it saved time and money and enhanced quality. All through those days of turning around tons of goods, my silent mantra to myself used to be “Measure Twice, Cut Once.” By these days of my adulthood, Dad had, of course, moved on in life but at every achievement of mine, I’d feel him smiling at me from the skies.

Staying with the principle of Measure Twice, Cut Once helped. It cut down costs, cut down errors, and rework. It built a culture of caution, precision, and quality consciousness at work.

Beyond the production floor and the workplace, the idea of thinking through twice before taking all decisions helped. No, it did not lead to analysis paralysis but it created a cross-check and kept decision-making objective and in perspective.

In matters of health, I thought twice about having that second glass of wine before driving. I thought twice about adding that second spoon of sugar to my cup of tea and I thought twice about skipping the gym and spending time on the couch watching television.

In matters of wealth, I thought twice about indulging in toys for big boys. I thought twice about that extra pair of shoes just because they looked like something I’d always wanted. I thought twice about investing in ventures that seemed shaky or shady and I thought twice about making or accepting promises that seemed hard to keep from the very start.

In matters of relationship, I took extra care before hitching my wagon onto somebody else’s horses. Also, once I went into a relationship I did not just snip away at the threads without fully thinking through with my head and heart about the matter. Measure twice, before you cut once, I’d say to myself while sorting things out.

All this did not guarantee an error-free life but it did reduce regrets and lessened correcting things that do go wrong at times. All this also did not squash spontaneity, creativity or the spirit of adventure in life.

Given that, I do invite you to go veer out onto the edge of living. I also urge you to go stretch your limits to the maximum. I also invite you to bungee jump but make sure that the harness and safety string is in place more than just once. Yep, Measure Twice and Cut Once, is not just a great idea for carpenters and tailors but works fabulously for family and business heads, bankers, inventors, and entrepreneurs of all kinds.

Now before I post this, I will make sure to read it twice before I hit ‘upload.’

Enjoy!

Touch Move and Self-Mastery

Many times in my life, I have had to sit across lawyers and have a conversation or two with them. The content of those conversations is at times of progress and at times of resolving tricky business and relationship issues. For decades, my lawyer to go to has been an old friend, Ranjeet Srinivasan, from my college days. In his younger days, he was chirpy, vibrant, and extremely intelligent. Not that he lacks any of those characteristics now but he has added on several whiskers of wisdom over the years.

On many occasions, I have seen him immerse into multiple, long-drawn, conversations with his clients while at the same browsing, marking, commenting, responding, and signing scores of documents that are placed in front of him. People bring him business scenarios, life stories bundled in tons of flak and noise while he sits there coolly hearing, absorbing, sifting, and sorting from facts from the fiction; gently, carefully, asking questions; making suggestions or requesting for time to think things through.

It is an awesome sight to witness. It is like watching a virtuoso working on multiple canvasses with scores of brushes held in tens of hands. It is a beautiful dance of conversations that convert chaos into works of art.

What does it take to be like that?

It takes living out the rule of ‘Touch Move’ from the game of chess before speaking, before taking action. It takes mastering the shenanigans of our own minds by our own mind. It takes accepting the millions of moments, opportunities, and annoyances as they present themselves without being controlled by the pain or pleasures those moments might bring towards us. It takes recognizing that we live in a beautiful world but it can become crazy and complex. It takes courage, compassion, and creativity to work in sync with nature and treating all other living beings fairly and justly.

Touch Move and Self-MAstery by Raju Mandhyan

The touch move rule is the most basic rule of chess. It means, when a player touches any one of his pieces, she must make a legal move. It means your word must be kept. It means you stay accountable for your actions and it means there is no turning back.

What does it do?

It prevents impulsiveness, regressions, and regrets. It influences players to think ahead logically, strategically, and creatively. It gives every player, every entity, and system a fair chance. It drives people into becoming sane, authentic, and influencers of a brand new and brave world.

German philosopher and chess player, Emanuel Lasker, could not have said it better with, “On the chessboard, lies, and hypocrisy do not survive long. The creative combination lays bare the presumption of a lie; the merciless fact, culminating in the checkmate, contradicts the hypocrite.”

There is no doubt that the pieces of our lives have to be influenced to win; to grow but the call remains for authenticity and ethics all the time. Therein lies self-mastery. Therein probably also lies the mastery of our domains.

I do not know if my friend, Ranjeet Srinivasan, plays chess but I do know he practices massive self-mastery all the time. There are five things that I believe he rigorously practices consciously and, maybe, unconsciously:

Self-awareness and Discipline: He knows his values and sorts facts from fiction created by his own mind with consistency.

Courage and Patience: He faces fear with clarity and is patient towards what might still be ambiguous to him on the road ahead.

Wisdom and Compassion: He knows what serves a value-driven vision and is forgiving towards whom he does not see eye to eye.

Fairness and Justice: He was schooled for the legal kind but age and experience have honed his moral compass to a higher degree.

Action and Initiative: He rarely sits on the fence of decision-making. After all the deep and broad thinking he takes action without fear and accepts all results without regrets or excessive excitement.

Life is no different from a game of chess. The playground for most everyone is this beautiful earth; this beautiful gift of life. We all start with a bunch of minimal resources from ground zero and then move up by inches or by yards. Some move forward with a twist, while others trudge along in straight lines. Many hesitate or haste or regress while others, those that touch move, take in the big picture and move their small pieces carefully, creatively, and confidently.

These last 20 months have been extremely tough for a large number of people across the world. We are all faced with a very persistent, tough, and ruthless opponent in COVID. Winning this war, at work or in life, will call us to think through every move multiple times before we touch the pieces. But move we must, and win we will, when we master ourselves first.

 

 

Photo by GR Stocks on Unsplash

About Process Facilitation

Go Forth and Multiply the Good!

What is it?

Let’s say you were born with the gift of knowing how to drive but had never driven on the streets. Then the traffic policemen, who guide you, through the mean streets of Metro Manila with all their support systems and rules are ‘facilitating’ your process of you reaching from where you are to where you want to go.

Let’s say you are a lawyer and there are two different companies who want to pool in their strengths, resources and their value propositions as a single entity and you are helping them merge then you are ‘facilitating’ them through well-tested processes and processes you are competent in.

Or the best example is, say you are a couple who are pregnant with a new life forming between you two and then there is this kindly midwife who is there to set up things,  calm nerves, offer advice,  guide you through childbirth and then help breathe out a brand new and beautiful life into your world, this world. She then is your ‘process facilitator.’

All of the above three professions and thousands of others similar to the these three have a certain set of rules to follow, practices to perform and capabilities to master in their chosen field of facilitating. And they all generate synergies, resolve challenges and create fruitful results.

The threads that run commonly among professional facilitators are that they have no personal objectives in the world that they are helping bring about; they have no stake in the outcomes that are created. They are mostly external observers, guides and encouragers who help build the support system for you to go from where you are to where you want to go.

What are the essential qualities of a great facilitator?

One, a very high sense of spatial awareness loaded with kindness and compassion for fellow human beings because all process facilitation impacts the wellness and well-being of mankind.

Two, a desire to help others bring forth newness, progress, productivity, life and/or whatever good they desire to bring forth. There necessarily need not be any personal agenda for the facilitator in bringing about the intentions and objectives of their clients. Yes, ‘clients’ is a safe word to use because professional facilitators, often, need to be compensated for their efforts. They can bear not being compensated if what they are facilitating are their own advocacies.

Three, virtuoso facilitators need to be very good at their own game and they need to have all the little and big skill sets required of them to be useful and excellent at what they do.

Across the world there are individuals and organizations who help professionalize all sorts of facilitation practices and interventions in the industry. One of the biggest and the most respected organization is known as the International Association of Facilitators Worldwide and proudly for us, here in the Philippines, there is a brand new, national, chapter that has sprung forth called the International Association of Facilitators, Philippines, Inc.

In the last three years this group has held, more than twenty, extremely low-cost but high-impact learning sessions serving the needs of teachers, trainers, coaches, consultants, lawyers, social workers and even powerful business leaders. Their intention and vision is support, nurture, guide all sorts of conversations, across the seven thousand islands, which are generative, positive and life-giving. Their services and advocacy include not just learning and development but also community and country development. It may help organizations of all sorts to tap into the fountains of compassion and competencies that flow through this global professional body.

Come to think of it, if you envision synergistic growth or giving life to another entity would you not want an experienced, objective and a kindly midwife to help you guide you through the process? Well, okay not really a mid-wife “mid-wife” from days gone by but a well-trained, correctly certified medical professional.

Yes?

Okay, in that case let’s go forth and multiply the good. Let’s go from where we are to where we want to go with the help and guidance of a professional facilitator.

 

Raju Mandhyan

www.mandhyan.com

Storytelling Legacies of Leaders

In the mid-1930s India, a spritely old man wrapped up in loincloth spoke of freedom, compassion, and peace. Mahatma Gandhi carried a big stick, marched across the nation to pick up a fistful of salt by the ocean, and eventually liberated the country. He spoke to his people through painted visions and he touched hearts through parables of possibilities, “Change,” he said “must come from the inside. We must become that change.”

Connect, Engage and Influence your World Creatively!

A few decades later in America, another visionary stepped on the podium and shortly after, set aside the text of his prepared remarks to improvise. Addressing a crowd of many thousands, he declared his dream—people from all corners of the country, from all walks of life, children of all races living together as one “to turn the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood.” He announced his vision to the world to change a nation.

In the early 1980s in the Philippines, a journalist-turned-statesman chose to stand up against tyranny.  Amid the toughest of odds, he flew home, stepped off the plane, and walked into the waiting jaws of death.  This act of courage gave life to a story that inspired millions to act.  Fired by his example and call of, “The Filipino is worth dying for!” the first ever people power revolution produced a peaceful transfer of leadership and changed the country’s future. People power became a global model for bringing about change at the country level.

In comparison to the last 20 years, the rate of progress and the proliferation of information and technology have been exponential and show no signs of plateauing.  How people will regulate and sustain life stories in the future is unimaginable.  The stories of today are flourished in diverse formats. They are told and retold to sound and music, in dance, in art, in words, in moving images, all in bytes and pixels.  Stories travel, morph and multiply at the speed of light with a cursory glance and the touch of a fingertip.

Will this explosion of knowledge and ideas through technology ever change the concept and the heart of telling stories? The answer is a flat out no!

Here’s why:

  • Wherever they may sit, leaders enhance their credibility and authenticity through storytelling to spark the change they seek. Storytelling does much, merely by advocating and counter-advocating propositional debate, which leads to increased discussions.
  • Storytelling is focused on the future. It is not just an extrapolation of the present. It swirls emergent, new phenomena and nourishes it by downplaying the doubts and misconceptions of yesterday.
  • Stories are about human empowerment and real transformations in organizations. Stories are about humanity. Stories are about us transforming into a better us. Stories are about us wanting to know who we are and about us wanting to reach for the stars.

A story is like mist that develops on the outside, but the wisdom emerges from the inside. When a story touches our hearts, it takes hold of us forever and silently sets us free. This is a never ending journey.  It is also a never ending symphony. As long as this quest exists, stories will always fuel and fire us. And, since this is a never ending quest, we will always be leading ourselves and others happily into the ever after through stories.

That is the HeART of stories taken from the book, the HeART of STORY, available on Amazon: http://goo.gl/OZSMj8

Posts on Facebook: https://goo.gl/MXQEqU

Talks on You Tube: https://goo.gl/dVclfm

Choice Clips from ExPat InSights :  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjf3sHaZBSo

 

Seven Plus Minus Two from NLP

Have you ever walked into a meeting late, because of heavy traffic en-route, and been unable to concentrate on agenda at hand right away? Does a part of you want to focus on the work while another part of you is still anxious, stressed and testy about the traffic conditions you just recovered from?

Seven Plus Minus Two Principle from NLP

Seven Plus Minus Two Principle from NLP

Or, at times, have you tried to pitch a presentation to an important customer, behind a large desk, who is signing papers, taking calls, punching his keyboard, sipping coffee while politely asking you to keep on talking. He claims he can multi-task and is listening to you but at the end of your pitch you still feel let down.

Meeting maladies similar to these can be resolved by understanding, in depth, another principle of Neuro Linguistic Programming: At any given moment, our conscious mind, can only hold and juggle with seven plus or minus two chunks of thoughts.

For example, while driving through traffic, you are intensely navigating, formulating an explanation for your tardiness, reviewing your planned presentation, pondering upon discussions or activities you may have concluded earlier, reading your messages on your phone, planning the evening, regretting not having eaten a healthy breakfast, thinking of the family, etc;  All this is hyper-mental activity. And, some of the areas that we reactively think about can be switched off to be able to calm yourself and focus on what is crucial. Just like a computer, the desktop of our mind can be faster and more efficient if it is running fewer applications at a given moment.

Your obvious question would be how do I do this? That’s correct. For yourself, you need to become conscious of the fact that you are running in a hyper mode and then zero in on your breathing and focus on it. A few minutes of paying attention to your breathing will shut down several less important issues the desktop of your mind may be juggling. If your mind wants to react, stop and go back to focusing on your breathing. In the long term practice will make you perfect.

How do you handle the customer behind the large desk, who wants you to go on talking when you know he is running in a hyper-mode and may not be giving you a hundred per cent attention? Stop speaking, slow down your presentation, deliberate on your pauses, and politely ask him to finish signing the papers or answering that email. Like: ” I see you like answering off important emails promptly?” That’ll break his trance, his pattern and he will look up and give you attention.

Ask him non-probing questions about the biggest chunk of thought he may be juggling on the desktop of his mind. Do or say anything that you feel will help him switch off some of the activities and give you better attention. A word of caution: Don’t be cheeky or obvious about it because that may embarrass him.

In summary, powerful leadership conversations are also about understanding and managing the subjective state rather than just what is on the surface. Practice these methods and you will find yourself achieving a lot more in half the time and at half the cost.

 

Find more insights like this one in my books on Amazon

Connect with me on Facebook/Raju Mandhyan

Five Laws for High-Octane Learning Transfer in Training

All my life, I have enjoyed and applauded great teachers of all kinds and in all walks of life. I have spent thousands of hours watching,

listening, reading up and pondering about how is it that there are a few teachers/trainers who transfer so much knowledge and wisdom and also do it in a light and a non-intrusive way. I have a special affinity for such people and my life has been blessed by many such “gurus” of learning transfer.

Here are a handful of laws, I believe, they follow to become good at what they do and to churn up learning in individuals and organizations. Mind you these are not just the things they do but these are their guiding principles and they follow them, consciously and unconsciously, as if they were unwritten laws for High-Octane Learning Transfer.

Read more

Enterprising Young Musicians

It is true that the cognitive business skills for starting, running, and succeeding at a business venture can be gleaned from a book and learned from business schools. But there is no entity that can impart and equip an entrepreneurial candidate with what economist Joseph Alois Schumpeter rather romantically described back in 1912, as “the will to conquer, the dream and the will to found a private kingdom, and the joy of creating, of getting things done.”

Most successful entrepreneurs do discover and master the science behind, “the will to conquer, the dream and the will to found a private kingdom, and the joy of creating, of getting things done.” But, after suffering excruciating pain and paying an enormous price.

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I hate brocolli!

I hate brocolli! I hate the sight of it. I hate it’s name. “Brocolli?” What is that? It sounds like some tropical disease. Like, “He’s got brocolli between his toes. She’s got brocolli in her armpits.  But then again, we do know its good for us. Its green and healthy for our insides and for our cancer fighting cells. And, some claim, it adds and multiplies brain cells.

Similarly, in my work-life there are things that I know that there are things we must do which will be good for us. Like learning to and keeping proper accounts. Learning to and keeping proper records and files of projects and programs. And, for professionals and small business owners like me, learning to build an active website and sustaining, nurturing it over time.

I hate brocolli!

I hate brocolli!

I knew this. I was told this, many a times, years ago by colleagues and friends in the industry and yet I kept thinking _assigning this to a professional or a professional team would be the smart thing to do. And, boy was I ever wrong! Nearly every other year, I’d look for to outsource this work and they’d come back and pick my brain, have me do the thinking, the brainstorming and making the website work for me and my business. ” At first I was doling out money in spades and getting aesthetically impressive returns. Then I tightened my fist and began to get function but no charm and no ease. All through, in the back of my head, I kept thinking…”I wish I was computer savvy. I wish I understood the internet as well as they do. I wish I were Generation X or Y or Z. I wish I weren’t a late-bloomimg baby boomer baby! Grrr!

Website building, maintenance and the world of internet marketing loomed over me like a huge clump of rotting brocolli.

Yet, a small voice kept telling me, “Go ahead, take a bite and start chewing. Go ahead, roll up and your sleeves, tie a nappy around your neck and dig in!

So, two week ago, I rolled up my sleeves, put a nappy around my neck, put on my reading glasses, plugged in the earphones and hauled my lap top closer to me and began clicking, punching, rewinding, undoing, doing, highlighting, reading, taking a power nap in between, and clicking, punching, rewinding, undoing, doing, highlighting, reading, listening until it began to make sense, until it began to take shape.

What you are browsing through right now is a still a rough draft, a skeleton of what is yet to come and grow. In essence, not only am I learning to eat my brocolli but I am also learning to plant, grow and make it flourish organically. That’s the way to go when it comes to learning and succeeding at something you consider hard and something that you figure you can set aside and a let divine intervention resolve it for you. No sirree! It doesn’t happen that way.

Can this same principle be applied for accounting, book-keeping and or maintaining records. Yes!
Nothing is more empowering and liberating than tackling any and all kinds of huge, ugly brocolli clouds that loom over you and slow you down. Hate that brocolli? Eat it first! It’s good for your soul;)

Inner Sun

An Unbalanced Life.

Most everyone is focused on living a balanced life. What exactly is a balanced life? Twenty fours divided equally between work, play, family, personal needs and service to the world? Or, is it stress at work, peace at home?

InSights on InSights

I didn’t start out to be…but over the years, I have become a serious learning addict. I started out as wanting to teach, train and inspire others but the process required taking in, processing, reflecting, accepting, experimenting and acting upon concepts and applications. Over the years, my capacity to do all this_ taking in, processing, reflecting, accepting, experimenting and acting upon grew massively. Today, at the close of nearly fifteen years of doing this the neural synapses continue to cut deeper pathways and the pleasure I keep getting out of this continues to grow. This, little act of putting out a blog is a part of the journey.

Some people may ask, why do this, to what end and purpose? To that I’d respond “Great question, many times I ask that of myself too!”

The answer is simple: If one is a farmer then they farm so that they can eat and feed others. If one is a mason, then one builds so he has shelter and others have a home. And, if one is an architect then he builds bridges so people can cross and get to where they have to go. At the core of my heart, I love teaching and this little act of blogging is one of the necessary tasks of a modern day teacher. It is supposed to challenge me then nourish and develop others at work and in life.

Yeah, that’s the insight on these InSights!

Appreciative Inquiry